Last year I wrote about how I get irritated about gratitude lists, but how I seem to find myself doing one at the end of the year, anyway. I’m not a therapist that keeps a journal at the side of her bed where I jot down the things that I’m grateful for at the end of the day. Rather, my journal is in my mind, making mental notes of things to be grateful for, especially when I’m feeling sorry for myself, angry or put upon. And it really does work.

But one of the things that holds me back from doing these lists is that they can get repetitive, but in a way that is hard to ignore. Why would I not say that I’m grateful for my family? My work? My health? My cat? Stable housing? Of course I am.

So I thought I’d cut through this mental spiral by reflecting on new things that I’m grateful for in 2024, and the more random the better. I truly believe that gratitude is found in everyday moments—things we can connect with and make real for ourselves. And the end of the year is a great time to reflect on these little things.

Office Chair

Late last year I deliberated too long and too hard about whether or not to get an office chair and depart from my then-jerry-rigged video counselling setup which consisted of sitting in a recliner with a wedge pillow and back form to make the chair upright-ish. At the end of each day of video calls I felt angry at the pain that was in my body.

Luckily, I listened to my occupational therapist and invested in a new office chair at the start of the year. What a difference lumbar support makes! I was reluctant to do so because of the cost, even paying an extra $30 for a dusky blue colour, but darn, that blessed chair makes me feel supported and gives me a lot of pleasure to look at. Thank you, chair.

Footstool

While we’re on the topic of furniture, I was beyond delighted to get a padded footstool for my birthday this year, allowing me to put my feet up for audio calls. Perhaps the significance of this is lost to anyone under the age of 40 but it really has been a middle-aged dream. I can’t say enough about the value of comfort while working, which has had the added benefit of reducing sensory distress and increasing my energy!

Breaking Bread Politics

For many years I have situated myself squarely in the camp of baking sourdough  bread. There is something very satisfying about the slow sourdough process and the fact that you can rise superb, flavourful bread without any commercial yeast. And I stand by that. But there’s also something very limiting about closing one’s mind to making yeasted breads which are ready a heck of a lot sooner, and as such, allow me more rest-time outside of the kitchen. And yeah, I happen to think that the texture of a yeasted sandwich loaf can’t be beat.

Rest Time

I’ve been taking a hard look at my (multiple) neurodivergence and I decided this year that it was time to get real. I’ve written before about not cheating the system but when I’m honest with myself, I still find ways to cheat the system, at the expense of my own wellbeing. So, I’ve been taking steps to work a little less (starting in January) so that I look after myself and those in my life better. And wouldn’t you want your counsellor to be adequately rested?

Wonderful Professionals

Part of prioritizing rest has been the realization that I can’t solve all my problems alone. So I’ve hired more professionals this year to help me do it. As I’ve aged, more annoying body issues have arisen, and as I’ve become more attuned to my neurodivergence, I’ve learned that certain parts of that need more support too. And exposure to new ideas has been so helpful.

My To-Do App

OK, this is pretty boring but it’s also deeply tied in with rest. One of my biggest problems historically has been keeping track of life’s details, particularly when it comes to management of self-care, supporting my family and co-managing my home. I used to spend too many hours mentally rehearsing what I had to do each day and not necessarily remembering all the things or even remembering the wrong things. But after considerable research I found an app that would hold this information for me and allow me to turn off notifications so I didn’t feel harassed. The list is there, and items can be easily punted to different days. I call it my second brain.

Friendships

This year I’ve challenged myself to connect with my friends more. One of the sad side-effects of being a counsellor, particularly a neurodivergent counsellor, is that at the end of the day, I can get pretty interpersonally drained. But I’ve come to realize that this is just the way it is but that I can reach out to the dear friends in my life in the moments where I am more rested. Further, reaching out doesn’t have to be an hours-long endeavour. What I ultimately want my friends to know is that I am thinking of them and that I value them.

Yarn Happiness

One of my happiest projects this year was re-organizing my yarn stash. My wayward yarn problem became a pressing issue after a family member gifted me with a very large portion of theirs. This organization project originally evolved out of an emotional imperative to decrease my stress when looking at multiple boxes of gifted yarn, but became a journey to satisfaction as I figured out a storage and organization system that would work. Plus, I have my yarn where I can see it when I come into my home office which makes me happy every time.

Teeth Flossing

This may be more information than you want to know about me but I have historically struggled to floss my teeth consistently. I could psychoanalyze myself about this ad nauseam but suffice it to say, it’s been a lifelong problem—that is, until I finally decided to do something about it.

I feel very confident in saying that I may have the world’s kindest dental hygienist who has never, ever shamed me for my flossing habits and has only ever expressed understanding and support. Empathy has a funny way of making a person want to make changes, so I pledged to her that I would floss. Really, I would. And I did. And I also discovered that the type of floss matters (at least to me) and can yield a completely different sensory experience, depending on the type of floss. All this to say, my dental hygiene self-esteem has improved a lot.

A New Coat

I bought a new winter coat online last year and I never felt good in it because I thought it made me look like a person who was swallowed by a fabric avalanche. “Megan, are you in there?!” Plus, the jacket was sensory hell: too hot for the Vancouver climate which left me feeling so uncomfortable, whenever I was out and about.

It took a lot of mental pushing through to convince myself that it was ok to buy a new coat–but under one condition: I go to an actual store and try coats on. Most of you know that I’m not a fancy person so I chose an un-fancy store. One of the last coats I tried on that day was in a colour I don’t typically wear (dark purple) but which fit me well and had the most irrisistable inner hood lining: so, so soft. I was sold.

Conclusion

I would be remiss if I didn’t say to all my clients past and present, as well as my wonderful Listening Ear readers, how much I am grateful for you! Thank you so much for being a part of my life. As Willow Tree celebrated it’s 15th anniversary LINK this year, it’s not lost on me that I could never have lived my best working life without you.Thank you, thank you 🩷🙏